Leave or Stay

When is it time to leave? I want to be here, but I'm far from wanted. He makes me feel bad about myself more than often and this is far from good for myself. He doesn't care. Instead of focusing on him I should focus on myself because at the end of the day I am all that I have. I have to motivate myself, care about myself and realize that it's better to experience the initial hurt than to experience hurt through out the relationship. I've been gone for a day and he tells me that he needs his space. I ask him has he been thinking this and he tells me that he thinks about breaking up all the time. I should just have the decency to put an end to the bullshit and focus on myself. I try to hide my own anger of what I go through on a daily basis and focus on his happiness. Why would anyone do that? Why would I do that? I don't want to talk about it anymore. I don't want to hurt anymore. We are not built to last and we won't. Especially when neither part wants to. I often think that maybe he starts this argument, or says things that he knows will piss me off, so I will just end it myself. He told me that there was no together. And it is impossible to let go of this statement. There is no together. He told me it was all over. Than over it shall be. I cannot care as much as I do because the only one receiving any type of pain is myself. I have to think with my heart and my mind. Obviously one of us is not up to speed. Could it be my heart? Or is my mind on point. The point is that I am the way I am, the way I have always been, just as he, and that’s fine, but I won't be disrespected, Ever! I feel as though his heart and his mind is not there. I want to leave for a week and not come back. Could I do it? I want to, but what is it that stops that? What is that thing that doesn't allow me to give him the space he needs. I wanted him to meet my father, but he won't. Only keepers meet my Daddy and I am unsure of how long this will even last, so why would I do that. I won't. I am not sad. I am more regretful, for my imposing. I should have let him be. I guess he was happy. So who wasn't, myself? And if so was I ever happy. Have I ever been happy or have I been trying to pretend that I was happy because I wanted him to be with me. There is still time for myself and I will always know that I have not met him. For we are not right for each other and this statement will live with myself forever.